Word o' the day:   Frippery:  1. finery, best clothes, best bib and tucker, sunday best, sunday clothes, 2.  frilliness, frills, frills and furbelows, falderal, trumpery, gaudery, fuss, foofaraw, meretriciousness, flamboyance, showiness, flashiness garishness tawdriness(ooh lala), 3.decorations, ornamentation, adornments, tinsel, spangles, trifles, trinkets, baubles, knicknacks, gimcracks, gewgaws, doodads, fandangles

 

1.  The beauty of the brisk autumn day made me want to go and buy some new fall frippery to wear while frolicking fanatically through the forest.

 

2.  "Such frippery!" exclaimed the dignified lady while watching Liberace perform.

 

3.  While Wanda sat in her stark, barren prison cell, her mind was filled with longing.  She missed  her trailer back in Kentucky.  Every corner of that double-wide was filled lovingly with baubles, trinkets, knickknacks, gimcracks, and gewgaws.  Of course...it was all stolen, which just brought her thoughts screeching back to the bare walls and coldness of her current situation.   Her frivolous fondness for frippery had proven fatal to her future.

Jenna and I had a fight last night.  A FIGHT fight.  We were in the process of it for over 2 hours.  It was the first big one we've had.  Dad even had to get involved.  It was one impasse after another.  She showed a side of her last night I've never seen.  In some respects, it sort of scared me.  What lies ahead in the next few years?

 

When the dust settled, I just felt bad.  It's very clear to me how my weaknesses exaggerate and heighten the situation.  When she starts freaking out and being...well....a pubescent almost 11 year old....I've got to be the adult. 

 

Can anyone tell me how to do that? 

Joel Lindsey, my writer-publisher-mentor-friend....i need to find one word for him....is "on the cape" for a month.  If you're a writer and you want to feel jealous...or after his post today, have your stomach start growling....or find yourself wanting to buy a bicycle...or wanting to write something that really will make a difference in this life....read his writer's retreat blog:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Disclaimer:  I'm not in a funny mood today.  If you want to laugh, I would HIGHLY recommend Kristie's latest entry on BenchwarmerUnderwear.  Dang that girl is funny.  She just needs to blog more often...I have a couple of those delinquent bloggers on my list.  I noticed they both posted this week.  YAY!  We'll call them collectively:  "KristGina."  Thanks KristGina for your entries of late.  I was blessed by both of them.  I know you're taking cruises and getting screamed at by church people 60 hours a week, but come on now!  There are people out there like me who need something to read while we sit in our quiet sunrooms and drink our coffee!!!!!  Try and think of someone besides yourselves for once!  Sheesh. 

 

Ok, so I wrote an entire lyric today. Actually, Gina and I finished a song this morning, and then I started on this one.  One song in a day.  For me that's pretty unusual.  I didn't even have the hook until I started working on another song, and the hook just jumped out at me.  So, I started writing, and voile...a lyric has been born.  It's done...and it's completely uncommercial. It will be added it to my growing "Livingroom Concert" file.  I finished it up as I was making soup.  Since my kitchen is right by the living room where the cd player is, I stuck in a famous Christian singer's cd to listen to as I cooked and wrote.   Every one of his projects have been  well crafted musings and ramblings of his view of life and faith, and God.  I wonder if he has a "living room concert" file. 

 

God is who He is.  He's huge, expansive, mindblowingly infinite.  Why do we only focus on parts of Him as writers?  I suppose it's because the love and grace parts of Him don't make us too uncomfortable.  Or do they?  Or should they?  His love for us got pretty ugly on the cross.  His grace required that Jesus suffer unspeakable agony.  Our sin is ugly.  God is holy.  He gets really mad, and nothing escapes his gaze.  We're all fooling ourselves if we think we can play church and get away with it.   

 

It was a pretty odd moment to be listening to the music on my cd player and then read the screen in front of me.   One of us is making tens of dollars more doing what he does compared to what the other is doing while making soup in her kitchen.  But neither of us is more right than the other.  Both of us need to do what God's prompting us to do.  Today, I was supposed write a song called Relentless, that sobers me and humbles me, and frankly, makes me want to just turn off all the music and pray for a while.  And only God knows what the guy on the cd has been prompted to do or write today.    Maybe he wrote something for his living room concert file as well. 

 

Time for some soup.

Here are a couple of things I've enjoyed over the past couple of days:

 

1.  Gas station popcorn--extra salty, a little burnt, preferrably a little stale

 

2.  Purposely searching out and driving STRAIGHT through the ginormous puddles that have been created in the streets from the 2 days of rain.

 

3.  Andy Griffith show.

 

4.  Aside from the gas station attendant, and the coffee shop lady, and my family, not seeing anyone for the past couple of days, and not having to get out of my sweats.

 

 

 

Sue C. started a writer's group.   It was REALLY fun to join them this week.  We talked about our processes, how we got started, why we're writing and then we went over a lyric or two. Sue also brought a very inspiring little devotion from Matt Redman.  I know there's a hook in there somewhere.  It was a great time!!  Sue is a great teacher, too.

 

She had called me that morning and asked me to bring some of my early stuff.  The hour trip to her town was quite a ride.  I listened to 10-15 of the first songs I wrote.  It was a pretty emotional hour.  It brought back the feelings of excitement and obsession of when I first started writing.  It brought back the deep emotions I was feeling in my life at the time as well.    The third song I ever wrote was called Someday.  Writing it was such therapy.  I LOVED that song.   It's unbelievably cliche, and predictable, and has virtually no wow factor..but it wowed me that fall 6 years ago.  When we finished that song, I knew I wanted to be a writer....forever.  There were also moments, while driving to Sue's town,  of laughing and shaking my head.  Wow...I've written some BAD songs.

 

And darn it if we somehow didn't run out of time that Monday morning.  I was SO bummed that I didn't get the chance to share my well-intentioned-but-really-really-bordering-on-terrible-first-attempts-at-being-a-writer-masterpieces.  I hate missing the opportunity to humiliate myself.  Oh well...maybe next week.

 

It was really cool sitting in with the writers from Sue's corner of life.  There was a range of experience and skill.  There was a range of areas of giftedness.  One is just testing the waters.  One is starting to give a voice to the things that have been going on in her heart for a couple of years.  A few of us have become full blown songwriting addicts.  And yet, we all met in that little circle, sharing a common feeling that this songwriting thing has blessed our lives, deepened our relationship with our Creator, and given us some wonderful new friendships.  May that never change, no matter where our journeys take us. 

 

 

Huskers are getting whooped

 

Tornado warnings are blaring on the tv (we're 20 miles from them)

 

Little sister is driving big sister crazy

 

Mom is wishing dad wasn't out of town.

 

Dad is with friends out at the lake, wishing the Huskers weren't getting creamed, and probably wishing he had some tums.  He just called and here's what he and the guys had for dinner:  Smoked deer, hamburgers, brats, and beef jerky.  No sides, no desserts...just a bunch of guys and piles of meat.  Knowing them, they didn't use plates either.

 

 

 

 

On the lighter side, going to Nashville is just plain fun.  Creative people can be HUH-larious.  I laughed a lot, even had a good cry with Sue, hung with great people, and left wanting to write my hiney off.  I LOVE that feeling.  Write About Jesus does that for me too.  I just feel so inspired to go write something after being around creative people and the creative process.  Even the down time was fun.  Coffee breaks, lunches and dinners were just more times to laugh, talk shop, and be inspired.

 

Those writing rooms hold a lot of memories for me.  I can't imagine being someone who's spent years in those little dusty boxes on the third floor of BBMP.  How many people have sat on those couches, at the piano benches, paced around in the 2-3 foot areas trying to write something the world would hear?   It's a pretty great place just for the sake of history, let alone everything else.  The housewife in me comes out every time I walk in one of those rooms though.  Next time, I'm bringing my vacuum cleaner, dusting cloths, and anti-bacterial wipes.   At one point, Rebecca Peck and I noticed that on top of one of the cd players, someone had completely dismembered a dead bug and just left it sitting there.  Well...let's hope the bug was dead before it got dismembered anyway.  hmmm.

 

It's time to go write!

 

 

One of the things that became more clear to me last week while I was in Nashville was that this is a business.   That's not good or bad...it is what it is.  It's a fact, and one that God apparently thinks I'm now ready to deal with.  In the conversations I had throughout the week, that reality was peppered in, both in positive ways and in negative ways.  What a strange thing the music business is.  We're creating, but we're also selling the creations...its a war of worlds in a way.

 

I'm ok with the "industry" side of Christian music.  I think there was a time when I wasn't.  I was drowning in the mundane, and songwriting was the antidote to that.  Songwriting filled that need for some measure of the romantic side of life, and any interference by reality was an offense to me.  It needed to be the thing that got me away from the necessary realities of life.  And in some respects, it always will provide that feeling.  Creating is a romantic thing.  It puts a twist on the mundane-ness of life, and for that I'm incredibly grateful.  However, at this point in my writing, it's time to deal with the fact that there are other facets of songwriting besides the creative, inspiring facets.   It's time to do business with the fact that this is a business.

 

There are times to budge, and times not to budge.  Every song can't be my opus---my defining work of my "career."  While I'm working on my defining works, I still need to write the stuff that will pay the bills so to speak.  That is budging for me, and a movement in the right direction.  I was putting way too much pressure on myself. It's nice to feel like I'm not selling out because I write something that is on the lighter side.   On the other hand,  one area in which I feel convicted not to budge, is the integrity of the lyric.  In the middle of dealing with this complex endeavor of writing beyond just a local level, that is one thing that has remained very simple and clear to me.  It needs to reflect the trueness of scripture, of who God is.  It may not be a mini-sermon....chock full of heavy truths...but it has to be true nonetheless.

 

The industry has its corrupt side.  It is riddled with people who don't pay their bills, who shamelessly self-promote, and who are only in this for themselves.  As I was hearing some of the stories of the smarmy side of Christian music, it only served to deepen my admiration for the people who can stay growing in God, and writing good songs.  I feel privileged to know several of those people.  They're balancing their passion for God with the reality of the industry, and it's a pretty amazing thing to do, if you ask me.

 

The bottom line in all of this is the bottom line for everyone who claims to serve Christ, whether you're a songwriter, or a banker, or a pastor, or an elementary school teacher:  to get up every day and do business with God before all else.  I've been convicted over the past few months to be in His word and in prayer before I check my e-mails, before I start to write songs for Him.  My business is the business of heaven first and foremost.  If I never get more than the cuts I've gotten, but have been faithful in growing in the knowledge of Him,  then I've been "successful" in God's eyes.  Isn't that what matters most?

It's a rainy Saturday and my kids are out playing in the puddles.  What a wonderful sight.  I'm sitting in my recliner, feeling like at any minute, I could doze off.  Bart and the kids picked me up from the airport at 10:15 last night, and I was asleep in my bed by 11:30. 

 

For some reason, I was having trouble with my site while I was in Nashville.  Twice, I typed in an entire blog, and then couldn't publish it for whatever reason.  So, I'm going to spend the next couple of days talking about Nashville now that my blogging privileges have been restored. 

 

This trip was different on a lot of levels.  I felt more comfortable, more creative, and more ready.  My co-writes were all great, and all for different reasons.  Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who prayed for me.  I felt your prayers throughout the week.

 

There will be more...I'm just getting a little fuzzy right now...time for a post-Nashville nap.

Last night, at 9:00 I arrived at my hotel in Franklin? Cool Springs?, Tennessee.  I'm here until Friday, writing with some great people.  My prayer over the past several weeks is that God would be Lord of my co-writes, that I would honor Him in all I do, say, and think, that I would remember who I am and do my thing, and that I would have some great creative moments with my co-writers.  I love those moments...where both of you sit back and know that what's happening is bigger than the both of you, AND the process is a BLAST.

 

Getting here is an accomplishment in itself.  When I dropped my bags on the hotel floor, I admit it....I felt a sense of smugness. *sniff*  In the 48 hours prior, I had slogged my way through a mountain of laundry, packing, grocery shopping, two girls' outfit co-ordinating (we CANNOT leave that task to dad), and helping with Jenna's fish report that was due today.  In addition, I survived two plane rides with a very upset stomach.  My stomach was NOT happy with me because I have been eating too many fresh tomatoes. (i can't help myself, they're wonderful this time of year)  I seriously didn't know at 2 pm yesterday if I was going to be able to get on the plane.  If I did, I was planning on losing all sense of dignity and propriety as I either 1. Made use of all the little bags in the pockets in the three seats in front of me, or 2 pushed flight attendants, women, children, whomever out of my way in my attempts to make it to the bathroom.  Since neither happened, I was feeling pretty good about myself.

 

Also, I'm seriously directionally challenged, and this is my first time to Nashville by myself.  When the lady pulled my cute little red car up to the curb side, I wondered where this little red thing was going to take me, because I knew it stood a better chance of making the right decisions on how to get me to Franklin than I did.  Not only did I make it without one wrong turn, I managed to conquer the jitters, drive, talk on the cell phone to concerned friends and family members who knew of my "directional shortcomings", turn on the dome light, look at the map, drive the speed limit, and not hit anyone.

 

My first outing this morning was to find the new Starbucks that Sue S. had mentioned in her blog a few weeks back.  After loading up on coffee, I headed back to write for a while.  Joel text messaged me....my very first ever..I feel so important....but then spent 10 minutes trying to figure out how to text him back.  Ok...when I type in a letter, it gives me options for the letter after that.  When none of those options work..how do you erase the one letter you don't want and keep the one letter you do?  I ended up calling him, and interrupting a meeting he was in, which was probably why he text-ed (tex-ted...is that a word?) me in the first place.   Hey, I got here without getting lost.  I'll save the text messaging mastery for another day.

 

To my faithful 5 readers...I will cherish your prayers for this trip.  Pray for God to be glorified, for some great songs to be written, for good times with my writer friends, and for me to find my way back to the airport. 

 

Oh, and P.S....I'll be staying away from tomatoes for the next few days. 

A typical roster of sounds at our house includes:

 

Dishwasher running

Washer/dryer running

TV

Phone ringing

Bart, Jenna, and Sarah wrestling

Lamps crashing over from wrestling

Mom yelling because of the wrestling-and-crashing-over-of-lamps

Meals being prepared (occasionally)

Mom and dad talking

Sarah playing make believe

Sarah making up songs to sing

Jenna playing Pink Panther and Heart and Soul on the piano

Occasional girl fights

 

 

AND NOW...FOR THE NEW ADDITION TO THE ROSTER OF SOUNDS........

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After pastor Rob announced he was leaving, it took me a while to get out of my mode of fear.  I've laid in bed wondering what will become of our church.  Change always brings the potential for division, and that has been a huge part of my prayer life over the past few weeks. 

 

Monday, I had lunch with several ladies in our church whom I don't get to see very often.  We sat and laughed, and cried, and encouraged one another for a couple of hours.  The topic of Rob leaving came up, and it was SO cool to see how each woman was processing it.  One woman in particular was such a gift to me.  She is someone who has an unwavering conviction in God's power and faithfulness.   When asked what she thought about Rob leaving, she responded by saying how wonderful Rob has been for this church, but that she just knew in her heart that God had great things in store for us.  She said He'd been so faithful to us over the years, He wasn't going to leave us now or ever.  Her eyes shone as she spoke, and her countenance was one of joy and peace. 

 

I leaned forward in my chair, soaking up every single word she said.  It wasn't Barb speaking in that moment.  It was God's truths.  They surrounded me and filled me with such warmth.   I felt like a shaft of light broke through the shadows of my sadness.   I wanted to stay right there for hours, and just listen to Barb remind us of who God is  and who He is to His people.  God is able.  God is faithful.  There's nothing He can't do. (except He can't sin...my 6 year old tells me that all the time)

 

I know a man who, 10 years ago stood before his church and faced discipline.  He had been unfaithful to his wife time and again and for years, had been unrepentant.  He was a Christian, but had fallen into some powerful sin habits.  God changed that man's life.  He repented in brokenness and surrendered his life in obedience to God.  His family has been restored, and his life is one that bears much fruit for God.  It's not been an easy road, by any means.  It was years and years and years of both him and his wife making hard choices to walk in obedience, even when their flesh was crying out to be indulged.   But even through the incredible difficulty of him choosing to arrest his thoughts, actions, and words, and his wife choosing to trust that God would heal her heart and grant her forgiveness...neither one of them takes the credit.   They give all the glory to God.  They are living proof of God's faithfulness to His promises and to us. 

 

Last week, that man stood in the very same place that he had stood 10 years before, with his wife at his side  and announced that they were going into full time mission work for an orphanage in Nepal.   The church was on its feet in applause.   wow...wow...wow.  God is able.  God is faithful.  There's nothing He can't do.